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HEROES IN THE HOME: PORTRAIT OF CARE
 
 
 


April 13, 2010  (1:45 PM) Bookmark and Share
Men supporting each other

They gather on the third Friday of every month in Strathroy,a small community just west of London, at the VON office to attend a support group for men who are caring for a someone with Alzheimer’s. Sarah Klaver, coordinates the program and she graciously agreed to take part in our first ever Q &A here at the caregiverexchange.ca. Today's topic: support groups for men.

Q: Are men more reluctant than women to seek support? If so, why?

A: Based on my experience, they do seem more reluctant to seek support. This could be because of differences in gender. Some men can be more hesitant in expressing the need for support.

Q: What are some of the things that men should watch out for that may signal they could benefit from seeking some support?

A: Caregiver burnout is a major signal that a man may need varying forms of support. Caregiver burnout can be characterized as one or many of the following symptoms: withdrawal from friends and family, loss of interest, irritability, changes in sleep patterns and emotional or physical exhaustion. The caregiver role can take its toll on one’s health and wellbeing. This demonstrates the need for caregiver support, including support groups and respite visiting.

Q: Are there unique stressors that male caregivers experience?

A: Absolutely. Men often find themselves struggling with roles they may not have been familiar with prior to the onset of their loved one’s dementia. These could include homemaking tasks such as meal preparation or laundry. Men often need to learn new skills to maintain the home. Our support groups are a great forum for men to express how they’re coping and connect with other men in similar situations.

Q: What kind of a difference can a support group make in someone’s life – what are some of the things that you have heard from past participants?

A: Support groups are essential in helping the caregiver through a difficult journey. The support one gets from their peers in the groups is incredible. Along with the encouragement of a facilitator, group members gain from helpful caregiving tips, peer support and ongoing education. Some comments that we've received from current and past members include:
  • “Sometimes you’re feeling shame and guilt, but the group helps you feel relief from those feelings.”
  • “It’s gratifying to know that you’ve helped someone else with a problem that you have already coped with.”
  • “It’s a great way to get ideas and tips to take home and make life a little easier."
  • “The group helped calm the fear of all of the different stages that we were going through."

Q: What can other family members and/or friends do to support a man the caregiver role?

A: Family and friends are invaluable to a caregiver. They can help him with simple things that will help make daily life easier. Just a few quick things we can do to help include: pick up a few groceries, share a meal and spend time with the person he’s caring for (for relief).  They can also gather information about help available and encourage him to access professional support. For example, home care, adult day programs, visiting respite programs and Meals on Wheels are a few ways to help cope with the caregiving role, in addition to support groups.
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The VON Alzheimer Community Support Program’s Men’s Caregiver Support Group is offered the 3rd Friday of each month from 10:00 to 11:30 am at the VON office in Strathroy. For more information aout the men's support group please contact Sarah Klaver at (519) 245-3170 or 1-800-265-7058.

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