March 8, 2010  (1:30 PM)
Endings aren't perfect but can reduce doubt
Imperfect Endings, a memoir by Zoe Fitzgerald Carter, details what happened when her severely ill mother began planning to end her own life and how she sought acceptance and approval from her three daughters. When I initially thought about reading the excerpt offered at Oprah.com I wasn’t sure I would be able to read it but Fitzgerald Carter shares with an honesty that is raw, not brutal. She also skillfully conveys that feeling of being suspended in time and place - not uncommon in circumstances like the death of a loved one. In my experience, most people aren’t as open or adamant as the author’s mother was about her end-of-life wishes. Even still, that created its own set of challenges.Avoidance, however, is not the answer. You may have to push past your own discomfort to discuss end-of-life care with your relative or friend but in the end you won’t be filled with doubt when the time comes to make decisions on their behalf.

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